First off I want to apologize for not completing my blogs on a strong note for UBBT 8. Alot of crazy life issues and work issues, then my old computer crashing all deverted my attention from blogging. No matter what is going on in my life I know I need to make time to get my blogs in. 10 minutes less sleep is never going to kill me.
Sifu Brinker asked us to talk about what we learned from our successes and especially from our failures this year. It is something I have been thinking about alot the last month. When I first got into the UBBT 8 last year I had no idea what I was getting myself truly into. For someone who had become basically a couch potatoe and was very inactive as opposed to active I had my work cut out for me. I remember vividly struggling to do 10 pushups or situps when I first started kung fu in november of 2010. Bending down to stretch was truly sad to see me barely touch my knees. But I learned to keep trying even on the days I hurt like heck and could barely catch my breath in warmup.
I can't thank everyone in the fitness class enough for incouraging me and most definately inspiring me in becoming a less round person and more in shape. The class was never brought down to my level, I had to work hard to achieve a level where I could keep up with the rest of the class. Somedays I felt great some not so much. But I learned to keep going even if it was at half speed. I still have a long ways to go to be truly fit but I get better bit by bit, day by day.
The one thing this year I didnt accomplish was to get my 5k run in. I ran every day in high school and somehow had myself convinced that getting back into running shape would be a piece of cake. Man was I disheartened when I started running in the spring. 11 years of smoking and another 15 of no where near an active enough lifestyle have put me alot further behind the old 8 ball as the saying goes then I wanted to realize. I lose my breath and find it very difficult to get back when I'm running. I am going to have to really work on a more gradual aproach to my running and see if I cant do a whole lot better this year then last.
I am so happy that my son convinced me to start kung fu. I have become part of something so much bigger then just myself. I'm part of a group of people who are trying to better themselves and the world around them. I am constantly amazed at what a truly fortunate person I am. I get inspiration from Sifu Brinker right down to the smallest of the tiny tigers everyday that I am in the kwoon. A year ago I was a negative, sarcastic thinker. Now my crew at work says I'm more relaxed, and positive. I look forward to the challenges each day instead of with dread. I just do the best I can. There is no such thing as perfect, just the road to mastery and hopefully discovery that life is truly incredible along the way.
I am by no means the best father, husband, colleage or human being that I can be. There is alot of work to do and old habits to correct before I can even say I'm pretty good. But at least now there is a small light at the end of the tunnel and a path to start on to get me there. The path is gonna have lots of branches and twists and turns on it and most likely some fallbacks. But if I can just keep focused on the outcome then I know the journey will be well worth it.
Thank you so much for allowing me the opportunity to fail Sifu Brinker. It has taught me more about myself then I am probably even aware of. But I will work on becoming more aware, so that I can grow and learn even more.
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